Ruminating on the "What ifs?"
Languid(dull,faint,weak)courtship with men left me stranded and shattered.After ruminating (chew,contemplate,reflect,muse)the various obscure what ifs,I apprehensively ducked(dive,immerse,plunge)again into the esoteric(hidden ,mysterious)sea of love after a sequestered(isolated,lonely)single life for good five years.

Looking forward to a new day...
I experienced another reason to look forward for a new day and with the new found affectionate soul mate,I forgo and cast aside my preferences in life and gave my unbroken thoughts to him and I said to myself"This is it"..

However,as the days past,family responsibility constrained me to go to Kuala Lumpur.I still extended and expressed my firm commitment and love to him through emails and occasional phone calls.Sigh,but one email from him thwarted the plans and dreams we both have for each other to a different course.He decided to part ways!!!

Tears Idle Tears...

Streams of doleful(painful,pitiful)tears extricated (freed,relaesed,relieved)from my grieved soul.

....Quiescent...
In the seasons to come,I will strive to remain quiescent(motionless,undisturbed)against opinionated (stubborn,self-assertive,dictatorial)men.

...Single again..

I began to divert my energy to my rewarding vocation at the Nightingales a sequestered(quiet,unfrequented)retirement home in the suburb of KL.

....The pain lingers...

I vehemently(fervent,strongly)admit I miss the frivolous(childish,silly) as well as sensible chats we use to have over the phone..

Things do "Indeed" fall Apart!

Broken relationship,a crushed spirit but not allowing my bruised and heavy heart tp weight me down!
Perfidious(unfaithful/deceitful)relationships is one of the riddles of life that keeps me from insulated and secluded from having any kinds of strings attached(emotionally)until one day ,a friend of mine(whom I have known since 2003)asked me out.

Turning back to my childhood days,my alcoholic and abusive father and my prayerful mother rarely portray their love for one another.
When vibrant,ambitious and fashionable women of my age are excited to be in the arms of someone who loves and adores them,I was never enchanted! Does it mean I am insensible and passionless??You be the judge.But thank God,am not a cloistered nun...And yes,I must say this that when I was in class 7th I almost joined became a nun.(Shhh..a fact that I dont share it with everybody,until now).The milieu where I was brought up....